Mood Swings

IMG_6105So, I’ve been sitting in the growing gloom of morning as the storms creep in feeling very alone and very cut off from everything and everyone in the world.    Given that my dog is at my feet and everyone I live with are where they usually are (squirrel girl asleep on the dining room floor and bear asleep on the basement couch) the feeling is in no way based in reality.

The rain has interrupted the satellite signal so the only sound is the rain on the roof and the windows and the patio and that lends itself to the feeling.

I’ve discovered when I’m aching more the moods are far worse than they are when I’m not.  I am way more short tempered and moody (crying to anger to crying to feeling contrite) and physically exhausted when the pain and stiffness creep up.

It’s a lot like the the storm, the thunder and lighting and rain… the anger, frustration, anger and tears… they come in, sometimes blow through rather quickly, sometimes stay for days.  Eventually it blows through.

And I feel so guilty because of it.  I know it hurts people’s feelings.  I know the way that hurts, too.

I’m looking so much forward to my twice put off infusion on Wednesday to blow out the cobwebs, the aches, and the moodiness.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s