Trying Hard To Maintain Faith in Humanity

My new normal is taking its tole.

It’s not that I am minding being hold up at home for the duration. In fact, I’m quite enjoying it. The commute to work is amazing. My cube mates are equally as amazing (4 dogs).

What I’m not liking so much is watching the unwinding stupidity around me.

Spring breakers determined to party regardless of the consequences.

Beaches full

tons and tons and tons of snark on facebook

What hit home hardest last night was when there was a news 8 article on one of the local distilleries converting from liquor production to hand sanitizer production. They are giving away a free small bottle of sanitizer to first responders, emergency workers and elderly. I asked (given that the governor announced that we are pretty much going into lock down tonight) how exactly you travel there for a small bottle. The question was actually kind of legit.

If you are elderly (or others who are at risk), you’re supposed to be extra super duper diligent on social distancing. How many people do you think are going to suddenly show up for free crap, especially when free crap includes something that is currently being hoarded by pretty much a bazillian people. I’m SURE that it will be limited to the 10 people that is currently the Ohio recommendation for gatherings… yeah, sarcasm implied.

I was amazed at the bullying and mean snark I got for the question. Yes, I know how to back out of my driveway thank you. Yes, I know I can spend $100 to get an uber to take me to get my $1.25 bottle of sanitizer… thank you. Yes, I know I can get on my bike and ride 40 miles for, again, a $1.25 bottle of sanitizer, thank you. Yes, I know the governor doesn’t have armed guards at my door keeping me in. THANK YOU VERY MUCH

Bear CAN NOT BE EXPOSED TO MORONS WHO ARE TOO STUPID TO BE HUMAN. THANK YOU VERY MUCH. Please assume that I am just too absolutely stupid to know that I can legally leave my house. I can not morally allow my husband to go nor can I (as someone who is immunocompromised) in good conscience take a chance that I’m going to be within a foot and a half of someone too stupid to not be out if they are sick.

I think the comment that sent me over the edge was when one very nice gentleman (SNARK IMPLIED) told me to stop being a sheep and just bleeping go.

I don’t think I’ve ever been called a sheep before in my life.

Spent a good bit of time last night locked in the bathroom crying because I have been so disillusioned by people. People are feeling justified in bullying other people because F$#( you that’s why. People seem to think it’s a joke… that the people who died had it coming because you know we need to thin the herd from all of those of us who are apparently a drain on society.

There have been people who I have been close to who have made the comment that they hate people and I’m just aspie enough to take that to heart (because I’m a people and I hope I’m not mean or quite as stupid as I apparently appear) but now I completely and totally understand the sentiment.

There are some beautifully wonderful bright spots in my life because of all of this ugliness that is COVID 19 but it has been pointed out to me by my son that I have lost a great deal of my Mary Sunshine-ness and he thinks that it will probably never come back.

I’m afraid he’s right.

I don’t know if I will ever be able to look at people in general and think that they are all doing the best that they can under the circumstances. I think that there are just some people who are not worth that much consideration.

Love and light

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