Fighting For Health

It’s been a long week and it’s only Thursday.  I’m listening to “Hiking Through” by Paul Stutzman.  I was really hoping today would be good.  But the sky is heavy and gray and nothing seems to be helping the stars lineup well.

I found out this morning that my mom’s mom fell yesterday (she’s 93) and hurt her arm.  Mom found out yesterday.  I think she assumed I already knew.  Yeah… um… no.  But I do now and I hate that momma is hurting.

Bear is really depressed and getting more so.  His PCP is gave him some mild anti-depressants.  I hope it helps.  While I’m spending my time fighting for his meds (apparently CVS Caremark is the only insurance company that requires you get a biopsy that could kill you in order to be approved for meds that can help prolong your life… OH WAIT… the biopsy could mean you don’t need it after all PSYCHE… can you tell I’m really frustrated with CVS Caremark?… yeah… it gets worse).

Tuesday I talked to caremark and esbrietcard and esbrietcard told me that I could use their card the first month and a half until the appeal process could be finished.  Yeah… CVS Specialty pharmacy said they would send me the 15000 dollars of meds using that and I would have it in a day or two… yeah… they called yesterday and the automated stupid computer said the meds would be delivered today all they needed was the address… yeah… once the human came on Bear was told that… um… no… the computer made a mistake, the order that was APPROVED AND PROCESSED was cancelled because the STUPID FREAKING PHARMACY will not fill the prescription unless the insurance company (THEIR STUPID FREAKING INSURANCE) approves the meds.  Stupid doctor taking medical school and shit… he should have just gone to work from an insurance company then he would have known EVERYTHING like they do.

The Esbriet company is working with me.  They are really really helpful (which is good since I absolutely HATE dealing with the insurance company who actually agreed with me that, yes, if he has the biopsy and dies because that is what they DEMAND they would get out of having to pay for the meds.

Is it any freaking wonder that Bear is depressed?

I keep calling
I keep fighting because he doesn’t have the wherewithal to fight right now.
I’m so frustrated.
I am reminded yet again why I resent my insurance company (you know… the insurance company that INSISTED that my doctor write my prescriptions in such a way that they can fill them… pish posh that the doctor went to medical school… THEY were more smartererererest because they bees the bestest in the whole wide worldness).

Ninety three days to Disney
Ninety three days
and Esbriet is on our side and helping

working on smiling and keeping the faith.  he’s my everything and I can’t let this get to him.  It will work out.  the meds will come.

Love and light
April
6/22/17