Category Archives: rheumatoid arthritis

Gallery

Scared in the dark

This gallery contains 1 photos.

In the daylight, it’s easier to keep my mind busy, easier to not think because I’m thinking, easier to quiet the voices that whisper in the silence.  At night, not so much.  At night, all of the things that I … Continue reading

Gallery

For me, It’s all about the spoons

This gallery contains 3 photos.

So, ever since it really clicked with me about spoons and needing to conserve spoons (see The Spoon Theory by Christine Miserandino http://www.butyoudontlooksick.com) because if I don’t, I really really feel crappy, sometimes for days, I have been accumulating spoons. … Continue reading

My RA eyes are getting really dry

Well, while this isn’t new… it is definitely very irritating (in a lot of ways).

For the last several years it has been a given that I have dry eyes and dry mouth  (sjogrens).  It’s kind of getting old fast.  But the newest development has really started to get to me.

I have started to have dry crusty discharge at the corners of my eyes.  Yeah, I know everyone does now and then, especially when you wake up in the morning.  Mine has gotten to be like that only fifty times worse.  My eyes are like that almost all the time and a few times it has gotten bad enough that when I tried to clean my eyes it has scratched my lower eye lid.

I use Refresh lubricating eye drops several times a day but the relief is only temporary and then it keeps coming back.

I’m going to have to break down and 1. rat myself out to my rheumy on Monday when I go in for my infusion and 2. go see my eye doctor to see what she has to say about the new development.  So far, I think that the epithelial basement membrane distrophy hasn’t gotten any worse but only the eye doctor can verify that.

When my hands/feet/hips/shoulders/knees hurt it’s annoying and they hurt but when it comes to my eyes I really start to worry.  The fear, I know, is needless… but… it’s real and it’s there none the less.

Anyone else have this interesting development?  I have been doing considerable reading but it is still kind of new and concerning.

 

April
11/26/16

When People Ask if the Cold Bothers my RA

So, I live in the great white (sometimes white… often for four or so months of the year there is at least the chance of white, and the resulting cold) northeast-ish.

Okay, I live in Ohio.  It’s not like I live in the wilds of Canada or in Alaska but I live in the north east where there is usually the chance for cold starting in late October and running through at least late February.

Yes, I knew it when I moved back north.

Yes, it was deliberate.

Yes, as I sit here in early August dreading my walk to work this morning and dreading more my walk to the car this afternoon after work, I long for the crisp autumn days and the smell of apples and drying leaves.

 

First  RobinNo, cold does not make my RA angry.  If I let my hands get too too cold they are very uncomfortable but, duh, that’s kind of a no brainer.  Everyone’s hands kind of ache if they are too too cold.  Cold makes my Raynauds a little bitchy so I carry hand warmers in cold weather in case I need them.  I buy them in bulk at <insert discount department store or super center here>.

I was told, when we started discussing Aspergers with the shrinks in Texas that if you have met one aspie you have met one aspie.  Aspies tend to have similar traits and experiences but it isn’t cookie cutter.  The same can be said for RA.

This is RA for me.  This is my reality and my experience.  August (hot humid weather) makes my RA a bit more on the bitchy side.  It makes my hands get floofy and it makes my fingers and toes ache.  It makes my jaws swell and leaves me with a headache that reaches from half way down my back between my shoulders, up my neck and stops at the bridge of my nose.

Rocky Days can have their own beauty

I have a jar of Tiger Balm in every backpack, purse and fanny pack I have.  I plunge my hands into cold water and revel in the relief.

This is my RA experience.  This is not to say it is yours. It is not to say it is anyone else’s.  I guess that has been playing in the back of my brain a lot lately.  The differences in how RA manifests, how it reacts to treatment, how it behaves in the body.

Guilty admission… I have gone looking longingly at the Facebook post of a friend after she was told that she can probably count herself as being in remission with RA.  I have to admit I’ve never understood why they call it remission, but that is a doctor thing.  I’m so happy for her that she is with less pain.  I pray that it stays asleep for a long long time for her.

I’ve been talking to someone I used to work with in Texas off and on about her experience with RA.  She has decided that the pain and swelling are just going to be her constant companions.  She is hoping that one of the newer drugs can help her but all of the biologics they have tried with her have not helped at all or if at all not for long.

And here I am, stuck in the middle again.  The biologics work for me.  I’m hitting three weeks between as of today again (looking forward to having to work from home next Wednesday because of my infusion).  I’ve signed up for December’s Santa Hustle and I’m looking forward to walking that half marathon.  I fully believe that, if we don’t have a foot of snow to ‘run’ through it will be a better race than the Presque Isle half a couple weeks ago.  Warm and humid do me in.  My fingers are all still parallel.  My aches are still mostly tolerable.  I’m exhausted by the end of the week, sometimes by the end of the day, but I try hard to remember to save spoons whenever I can.

No, cold does not irritate my RA.  Being looked at and groused at because I know my limits and I need to make alterations (“but you do half marathons”) when I need to irritates me way more than the weather ever irritates my RA.

So, yeah

Don’t let people pigeon hole you. Don’t take shit from anyone and be gentle with yourself.

Love and Light
April
August 3, 2016

Gallery

On NOT Living In Fear

A very talented musician and artist died this week.  Glenn Frey died of complications for RA/Crohns/Pneumonia.  When I heard what the cause of death was, I stopped one thought about the fact that… he was like me.  He struggled with … Continue reading

Starting a New Support Group

 

So, Kim Nolte and I started a new support group on Facebook.  Living Life Large with Rheumatoid Arthritis.

The idea that winded its way through my brain, as I walked home from Giant Eagle on Thanksgiving morning (yay needing milk), was… most groups seem to spend a lot of time “one upping” each other on how bad their RA is, how bad their pain is, how much they can’t do.  If anyone (including my boss) has noticed anything about me, it’s that I try to do as much as I can do despite my RA.

This, apparently, is a good thing.  This… apparently… is motivational to people.  So, we were talking, and we decided that motivational is a good thing.  So we started a group for just that purpose.  People with RA, to lift each other up, to provide useful dialog.  Yeah, some kvetching and bitching, because, let’s face it, RA kind of sucks even if you are determined to keep going.

The ground rules… no bullying… not dumping on people for their religious beliefs… no dumping on people for speaking a different language (they have really cool tools to help translate different languages… google translate got me through my Brazil project at work, it can freaking close the RA gap between people, too).  RA bullies us enough, we don’t need people bullying each other. I’m a  DBA (literally, database administrator… but philosophically(( LONG long story)) dat bitch April) and I will not hesitate to delete someone for behavior unbecoming the group.

SO… if you are on Facebook and you have RA (not to bully, or shun anyone here… Fibro, Sjogrens… any of the wonderful flavors of pain we deal with) and you want to have some support and motivation… come join us.  I have a really hard time with being in your face with self promotion, but I really think this is something worth being outside your comfort zone with… COME ON DOWN… and join us.

It’s very disheartening to see 2 members every morning…

That Time of The Month Again

2010 09 07 16 49 28

2010 09 07 16 49 28

Not quite dawn and here I sit, waiting for it to be infusion time.

I wasn’t totally sure I was going to be allowed to get my infusion today… I have been messing around with an infected toe for… well… several months.  You would THINK I would have had it taken care of long ago, since my out of pocket maximum for the year is well past and I should KNOW better than to mess around with stuff too long.

I didn’t.

Instead I waited for it to get better on its own.  I cleaned it all the time and kept bandages on it (to keep my sock from sticking fast) but it would not heal.  Finally I went to the doctor (have to go to the family practitioner first so they can look at my toe and tell me it is infected and I should see a podiatrist.  They can also tell me that I don’t look like I have RA because all of my fingers and toes point in the ‘right’ direction and “Let me TELL you about my mother’s RA.  It was so bad, when she was 70, that she couldn’t make a fist any longer and rather than pulling weeds, she took to pouring gasoline on them”… so yours must not be that bad.

grrrrr

sigh

So, I go on a mad podiatrist hunt.

There is something about being affiliated with a megalopolis hospital system (I thought… ha ha ha) is that there are bunches and bunches of doctors in the system so I would probably not take FOR freaking ever to get in to see any given specialist, even if I would have to drive 30 or 40 miles to see one.  Yeah… NOT so much.  I have an appointment (the soonest I could get) December 10 35 miles away.  They changed it from the one I had on December 28th just up the road.

I was a bit miffed, to say the least.  I have two ‘races’ coming up in December and I really didn’t want to have to deal with it that long.

The ‘other’ hospital system wasn’t any better.  They could work me in on December 18.

There are hospitals and medical pavilions EVERYWHERE around here.  HUGE ones.  Dermatologist?  six months waiting list (better hope that melanoma can wait just a LITTLE longer… ).   My family doctor is taking “sick people” appointments a month out and physicals are three or four months out.  <<that reminds me… it’s time to make my April appointment for my physical>>

I remembered the third option for doctors and… amazingly… called Friday and got worked in on Monday.  The doctor, argyle socks, burgundy denims and an incredible bow tie, was amazing.  His computer had a 26.2 sticker on it (made me smile).  He fixed me up before I left.  Cleaned out the yuk and its cause and made sure it would say gone (at least for the foreseeable future).

He told me that my RA has spawned bunions (haven’t you noticed your running shoes fitting less well?) that may need to be addressed in the future. He sent me on my merry way.

I emailed my doctor yesterday to make sure I should ACTUALLY come in for my infusion.  No answer, so I guess I should.

So here I am, dressed in sweats and a long sleeved T-shirt getting ready to go to work at the other computer in my office and get some crap done… in a couple hours I will trot off to the doctor and infusion center!

I hope they have the yummy graham crackers today…

For now, let me leave you with this parting observation… if something hurts, have it looked at.  Don’t put it off hoping it will fix itself.  Don’t chalk it up to old age.  Have it looked at.  You are worth feeling better for…

Author: April Wells
Updated November 11, 2015

Gallery

WHY ME!?!?!?!?

This gallery contains 1 photos.

Sometimes it gets very easy to fall into the  “Why Me”s. Why do I have this <insert what this is>? Why do my kids have to fight <whatever it is they are fighting>? What did I/We/You do to deserve this? … Continue reading

Brushing My Hair

20150314_141350As often as not, we of the great RA club, hands have issues.  Sometimes they hurt.  Sometimes they are just really tired, or have limited range of motion.  Regardless of why or what or how, hands tend to be a little more of an issue than some other pieces and parts.

Picture
While being a part of the club also often means that (thanks often times to the drugs that work to keep the rampant inflammation in check) we might have thinning hair, it is important that we can work to maintain at least appearances the best we can.  You really do feel better if you can find a way to make yourself look a little more human.

Something I’ve always enjoyed doing is brushing my hair.  I also like brushing my kids’ hair but they are kind of getting old enough that they don’t need me to do that for them anymore.

I have discovered the usefulness of animal brushes.  Not all brushes are easy on my hands, but the ones that don’t actually have “normal” handles are much easier on my hands and wrists.  Some of them remind me a lot of the horse brushes we used to use to brush out the horses when I was growing up.  Those brushes are REALLY big, compared to a human head, but the idea is really neat.  You put your hand inside the strap and you don’t have to actually hold onto anything. The other alternative (the ones I found this morning that are a lot like the one that my daughter lost in Sequine when she went for drill team) has a kind of handle on the back of the brush that fits between two fingers on your hand and you don’t have to hold onto them at all.

Picture

Granted, these brushes aren’t cheap.  The blue ones are <insert OOOOOOOOoooooo here> are Martha Stewart Pets brushes and are 13 dollars a piece at PetSmart.  The others are ConAir Pro Dog brushes. They are smaller and lighter and roughly half the price.

Picture
There are several different styles, several different “tooth” styles that are effective on different styles of hair.  Today one I found was Boar Bristle (with Nylon) and it feels really comfortable.  One of the ConAir ones that I found today was just srpingy wire and I thought it was probably going to be too hard on my head.  I might be wrong, but I really didn’t want to take the chance.  I have a variety now, some I can just toss in my bag when I go to work or on a run.

While I do understand that there are people who have a very great aversion to combing their hair with a dog brush even if it has never been through a dog’s coat, I also know that I’m learning more and more that I need to not worry about what people think about what I do.

These brushes help even when I’m having big issues with my fingers.  I’ve used all of them today, to see the differences.  I’m glad I found them.  I’ve been looking for the replacement brushes since 2011 when my last one went missing.  They help.  And they are very much worth the money I spent to be able to comfortably brush my hair.

At least they are worth considering if you are willing to take the chance.

Gallery

Where did my week go?

This gallery contains 1 photos.

Sitting in front of my window watching out at the not quite yet winter storm round whatever round this is.  We are supposed to get half a foot of snow by tonight.  Should be interesting.  I plan on surprising the … Continue reading