Yesterday I worked 14 hours. By the time I got home I was exhausted and aching. My shoulder was sore. When I got up this morning my shoulder was hurting about a 12. I MAKE myself use my arm to try to get the synnovial fluid worked out of it. I’m trying to make myself feel less horrible. It isn’t working.
I hurt so bad today I actually called my rheumy to see what I can do… I took the anti-inflamitories that she gave me this morning (max dose) and it did NOTHING… So I called… and I talked to the nurse three times. The last time…
There is a steroid pack at the pharmacy… that I can pick up after it hurts like this for SEVENTY TWO hours. I had to put in 9 hours today… I have to haul my butt into work tomorrow because we have a very expensive contractor there and it is critical that I be there. My back up… yeah… he can come in 5 hours later than the rest of us yesterday… he can leave early today… because he is tired and his back (surgery 7 months ago) hurts so much that he has to be home. and I “got” to come home so I didn’t have to stay at work 14 hours again tonight… I have to WORK as long (oh… and I “got” to be volunteered to have my trouble ticket made a severity 1 and worked 24 x 7 because obviously I am the ONLY FREAKING ONE who can DO it and I so totally don’t need rest.
I am cranky tonight and feeling like not only am I taken for granted… I am ignored when I talk.
Between the pain that makes me near tears all day and the “you really don’t matter as much as… well… anyone else” attitude… I so want to just lay down and curl up with my blanket and sleep… which I can’t do.
The single bright spot in my today?
There is someone at work who rode to my defense today… made sure that boss man heard him say that what I do is appreciated… most particularly when I do it without bitching when I am not the one on call to jump when something is needed… but do it because I am there and I will get the job done. That made me smile through the pain fog.
I am so hoping to get a little sleep tonight…
Warm gentle . How I wish I could help.